Hello everyone!
First off, I want to thank everyone that took the time to leave me a comment or send me an e-mail. Your words of encouragement really meant a lot. Secondly, this is the last entry in my series about failing at Ross. So, I warn you - it'll be long. I really don't want to drag out this "failing" topic any further. I would much rather get to writing about more interesting things such as ... ?? Actually, there isn't anything interesting really to write about. I'll think of something. Anyway, here it goes!
The last time I left you all, I had written a recap of my first, first semester. But what happened after the final? Well, as it turns out, A LOT. After I came out of the final exam, I didn't feel it had gone too horribly wrong. I did feel that the Biochemistry section was murder but the rest of the exam was O.K. Honestly, I couldn't care less how I did in the other subjects. I knew I would pass the other four classes just fine. I was just hoping I scored well enough to pass Bio. After the final exam, Michael and I had five days of riveting fun (NOT! The island is SO boring when everyone is gone!) until our flight home. Of course, with nothing to do, I constantly refreshed my e-mail hoping to see an e-mail from the Exam Center. However, five days passed and no grades were posted.
My grades were finally sent to my e-mail on April 30. (Our final exam had taken place on April 22, FYI.) As soon as I saw that e-mail, my hands started sweating and my heart began to race. I downloaded the document and opened it up in Microsoft Word. When the document opened, I immediately searched the page for the Biochem section. When I saw my grade, I couldn't believe my eyes. Under Biochemistry, it said "Letter Grade: C." YES, YOU READ THAT RIGHT! According to my grades from Ross' Exam Center, I passed Biochemistry! I don't think you could have found a happier person in the world at that very moment. After a quick glimpse at my other grades, I ran downstairs and woke up my mom to tell her I had passed first semester.
I went back upstairs and stared at the Word document with my grades. I just really couldn't believe I had passed Bio! Typed in a box at the bottom of the document were our semester's MPS scores for each subject. The Biochemistry MPS was a 57. I found it strange that even though my reported cummulative score was below MPS, my letter grade said I had passed. Normally, if your cummulative score is below MPS, that means you failed the course. But, in this case, an F would appear as your letter grade. My cumulative score was below MPS but my letter grade was a "C." Perhaps there was some sort of curve?? It crossed my mind that somehow Ross made a mistake but I just couldn't (or perhaps didn't want to) believe it. So many questions flooded my brain. If Ross did send me the wrong grades, how could a professional medical school possibly make such a horrific mistake? How could I receive a grade that said I passed when in actuality I failed? Even though I thought this possible, I dismissed the idea because it seemed too implausible. Also, my other four grades were correct. My cummulative scores matched the letter grades assigned. So, why would my Biochem grade be the only one that was incorrect? This, coupled with the fact that I NEVER received an e-mail or notification stating otherwise, made me believe that when I got back to Dominica, I would be a second semester student with my cousin, boyfriend, and the rest of my class.
The next day, I went on ValueMD to see if other people were in my same situation. It turns out, there were. And there were people in the opposite situation. Someone wrote that the Exam Center had sent them an "F" in a class they really got a "B" in. Quickly, things weren't looking too good for me. It looked like Ross really was that unprofessional and irresponsible to send out the wrong grades to its students. I never thought a medical school could make such a mistake. Some students were told they passed classes they failed and others were told they failed classes they had passed. Still, there were no e-mails issued stating something like "Please disregard your grades. You may have received an erroneous grade." No e-mails were sent stating something like "I'm sorry to inform you that you failed a course." After Ross sent the e-mail with my grades, I didn't receive a single e-mail from them regarding grades or passing/failing a course.
So, I flew back to Dominica unsure if I had passed or failed first semester. But I quickly found out the next day at Registration. When I tried to register for second semester, the Dominican lady quickly squashed my attempts when she looked me up in her computer and informed me that I needed to see Dr. L. That's when I pretty much knew. If you have to see Dr. L, it's NOT a good sign seeing as to how she's the head of the Promotions Committee. (The Promotions Committee basically decides who passes and fails.) Unfortunately for me, it was 5 PM on a Friday so I had to wait till Monday to figure out my registration situation.
That Monday, I made the line to speak to Dr. L. Turns out, LOTS of people needed to see her. When it was finally my turn to see her, I walked into her office and sat down. She asked me for my name and then she asked me which classes I would be repeating. O.K., so now I DEFINITELY knew I had failed Bio in first semester. She informed me that I had to repeat a minimum of 3 out of 5 subjects.
Side Note: DPS is not worth as much as the other classes; it's only worth 2 credits while the other classes are worth 3. So, if you fail a class at Ross, you must retake that class plus two other classes. DPS cannot be one of those classes. You can retake DPS as a fourth class. For example, if you fail Anatomy, you can take Anatomy, Histo, and Physio. If you also want to retake DPS, you have to retake it as a fourth class. So, you would take, Anatomy, Histo, Physio, and DPS. DPS is not worth enough to be one of three classes you repeat. If you want to retake DPS, you have to choose your three classes PLUS DPS.
Double Side Note: When you repeat a semester, the repeat grade DOES NOT take the place of the original grade. For example, if you got a "C" in Histo and you retake it and get an "A", your "A" doesn't take the place of your "C." In reality, they average. Basically, your GPA for your two semesters (the original and the repeat) average to give you one GPA for that semester. Another way to think about it is that at the end of your basic sciences, you'll have a cumulative GPA based on 5 semesters instead of 4.
So, I decided to retake Bio, Anatomy, Physio, and DPS. The only class I'm not retaking is Histo. Even though I love Histo and I did very well in it last semester, I find Histo to be too time consuming. In my opinion, the most time consuming classes are Histo and Biochem. This semester, I really wanted to make Biochem my focus so I choose not to take Histo again. Once I told Dr. LaVille which classes I would be repeating, she gave me the famous letter you need for registration. I walked over to the Administration building, finally registered, picked up my refund check, and went home to prepare for another first semester. Good thing I kept all my notes organized and readily available!
After registration, I received an e-mail from Academic Success stating that a mandatory meeting for all repeaters would take place. I was instructed to reply with what course I failed and which classes I would be retaking. I assume the purpose of this was so they could group people that had failed the same subject and are repeating the same classes. In case you didn't know, when you fail and consequently repeat a semester, you're required to go to weekly Cognitive Skills sessions with your group. It's just one of the perks of being a repeater. Anyway...
So, we had this famous meeting during the first week of school. What an interesting afternoon that was! Before the meeting, I was really curious to see who else had failed. I mean, when you're going through all the emotions and problems of failing when all your friends passed, you start to feel very isolated. So, I was kind of hoping I would recognize a fellow buddy in the room so I wouldn't have to go through "repeating" alone. Well, walking in to that conference room, I was amazed by all the faces I recognized. Looking around, I was shocked to see that certain people had failed. It just didn't seem like they were struggling. And to be honest, I wasn't too surprised to see some of the others.
Side Note: Word of advice, don't listen to anyone here. One of the things I've noticed at Ross is that there are some major liars here! Apparently, everyone does "really good" on the exams. Then, weeks before the final, some of these people that were doing "really good" are all of a sudden confessing their fears of failing one or more classes. Case in point: After studying in the lab for the practical, my boyfriend and I ran into a mutual friend. As we walked away, my boyfriend told me, "that guy's a monster. Did you know he's got a 4.0?" I was all jealous (not in an evil way!) and curious as to what it was he was doing (and I needed to be doing) in order to do so well. Fast forward six weeks and that same "4.0" guy was sitting in that meeting for repeaters with me. The point is that it used to get me a little down that everyone around me was supposedly doing stellar while I was struggling. The truth is that a lot of people are struggling here and I think they're too scared or embarrassed to admit it. So, if you find yourself struggling, don't feel too bad because I assure you, you're not the only one - even if no one else is saying it. Back to the story...
Once the meeting began, it was like something out of an Oprah show. The academic success people stood in front of the room with a microphone and conducted what seemed like a therapy session. They asked lots of questions like:
"How does it feel to come back as a repeater?"
"How did you feel when you find out you failed?"
"Do your friends and family know that you failed?"
You know, questions like that. So, they asked these questions and passed the mic around the room to whoever wanted to answer. And so we all sat around and talked about our feelings. However, the meeting took quite a drastic turn when they asked something like, "how did you feel when you saw your grades?" Someone raised their hand and answered into the mic, "well, it didn't feel good seeing my grade change from a 'C' to an 'F'." You wouldn't believe the shock on the faces of the academic success people. They were completely perplexed as to what this student was referring to. "What do you mean?," they asked. Well, to keep it short, we told them about how Ross sent us the wrong grades and how no one notified us that we had failed and how some of us didn't find out we failed until registration. So, for what seemed like forever, people spoke into the mic expressing their anger at Ross for handling (or rather not handling) the situation the way they did. At one point, one of the academic success people told us to "stop bitching because it wasn't going to get us anywhere." While I think that was a little inappropriate, they were right. Complaining wasn't going to get us anywhere because the fact that we failed was not going to change. It was visible that the students in the room were sad and angry and everything in between. For some in that room, they had just find out days before that they had failed. It was obvious some people weren't dealing with repeating very well. I guess that is why the meeting started out like a therapy session. From past experiences, they probably knew the students would be feeling the way they did. Though, there were some people that were surprisingly optimistic and grateful to be getting a second chance. Still, these people were in the minority from what I saw.
So, yada yada, they apologized for Ross sending out the wrong grades and everything else. We were also asked to write down on a blank sheet of paper about our experience with the wrong grades and lack of notification and so on. I guess they needed evidence? After, we broke into our groups so that we could meet our facilitator (as well as each other) and to set up our weekly meetings.
That's pretty much what went down in the meeting. One person did want to know how many people from our class had failed. The academic success person told us to look around and double the number. They said that about half the people chose to repeat. Well, there were about 50-60 people in that room. So, I'm guessing somewhere around 100-120 people total failed. I have never found out exactly how many people failed. All I know is that there are 50 repeaters. I know this because I counted all the e-mails in the "To" section in one of the e-mails academic success sent us.
PS: Do you think I use my time properly? And I wonder how I failed last semester.
Side note: I saw the list with the names of the repeaters and which class or classes they had failed. I'd say about 80% failed Biochem. A handful failed Histology, Physiology or Anatomy. I don't think anyone failed DPS from what I saw. And for the most part, people failed only one class. But, there are a few that failed Biochem and another class. For future first semesters, if you didn't already know, Biochem is the monster that trips people up. Look out for it...
Double side note: After every Mini, the Exam Center sends you a Word document with your scores. As it turns out, sometimes they get those grades wrong as well. There is one repeater (I shall call them "Shrek") this semester that failed because of an error in their Mini 1 Biochem grade. The Word document the Exam Center sent Shrek had a rather high Biochem score for Mini 1. Then, Shrek did well enough on Mini 2 Bio and Mini 3 Bio that when it came time to study for the final, he chose to spend more time on the other subjects. He neglected Biochem for the final because he felt he was in no danger of failing Bio based on the grades the Exam Center sent him. When Shrek came to register for 2nd semester, he was told he had failed first semester. Turns out, the score the Exam Center sent for Mini 1 Bio was in actuality MUCH higher than Shrek's real score. So, when Shrek's cumulative score for Bio was calculated, it was below MPS. So, my advice is this: When the Exam Center sends you your individual responses (sort of like an electronic version of your scantron), grade it against the answer key posted on Ross' Student Resources Page. This way, if you see a large discrepancy between the grade you calculated (make sure you grade it correctly!) and the grade the Exam Center sent you, then you know an error was made. You can also go to the Exam Center and see your scantron yourself. Bottom line: don't take the grade the Exam Center sends you to be set in stone because it could be an error. You need to know where you stand in every class so that you know how to distribute your study time and energy for the next exam. It's a numbers game. You may need to neglect one or more classes you're doing well in so that you can dedicate more time to the class/classes you're struggling in. If you don't have the right grades when you do these calculations, then what happened to Shrek could happen to you. So, make sure you have the right grades. Don't take the Exam Center's word for it.
Anyway, so the semester began. As a repeater, our semester is a little different. Even if you're repeating, you still have to go to PBL. "Ugh" is all I have to say about that. And because we're repeating, we have our mandatory cognitive skill sessions every week. We also don't have to redo the blood pressure lab (that's a one time deal unlike weekly anatomy lab) because we did it the previous semester.
And then there's lab. Like a total loser, I actually went to the first lab of the semester. Man, that sucked. It was the worst case of "been there, done that" I have ever experienced. The first semesters were in awe of the cadaver much like I was my first time. They were all giddy and "this is so gross yet so cool!" I was all anti-social, depressed, and "yea, it wears off." I was all dark and twisty inside. At that point, I wasn't in the place I am now where I had accepted my fate. But, I soon cheered up after lab when I ran into a fellow repeater. She was confused as to why I was in my scrubs. I was confused as to why she was confused. That's when she informed me that I could opt out of lab. Since I was repeating, I didn't have to redo the lab portion of Anatomy. If I had known this, I definitely wouldn't have gone to that first lab. She also informed me that I had two options regarding the practical exams. I could either retake them this semester or keep my practical grades from last semester. I did not know this key bit of information. Are you shocked that Ross failed to inform me of any of this? Yea, me neither. So, the next week before lab, I marched into the head Anatomy guy's office and told him I wanted to opt out of lab. However, I did tell him that I wanted to take the practicals this semester. I chose not to keep my old grades because I knew I could do better. And I did! This semester, I got a 97.5% on my first practical. I missed ONE question. I know that sounds all show-offy but considering what I've been through, I am so happy and proud of myself that I did that well.
As far as exams go, we take the exact same exams as the non-repeaters. We just skip the questions from the classes we're not taking. Because of that, we get less time on the test. During the exam, all the repeaters sit in the same row and there's like a designated time keeper that walks around with a post-it telling us individually how much time we have left. For example, someone repeating four classes gets more time than another person who's repeating three classes. So, we all have our individual time.
I know that some of what I've written makes Ross look really bad. Truth is, I think Ross is a total mess. Sometimes it seems like they can't get anything right. Still, Ross isn't perfect but they do give you the opportunity to fulfill your dream. That being said, because they seem to get things wrong A LOT, just keep a look out for yourself. I choose to write about my experiences with Ross because I hope that other students learn from my experiences. I believe that if you're going to pay a school ~$13,000 per semester, you deserve the truth as to how they handle your education. So, it is never my intention to make Ross look bad. After all, no matter how imperfect this school is, it is still MY school. And I honestly can't say another Caribbean medical school is any better because I simply don't know. My only experience is with Ross. I just hope Ross realizes that they need to make changes to better serve their students. And if Ross can't make those changes, I hope the students learn to look out for themselves so that they can do what is best for their medical career. My best advice is to not put your future in Ross' hands as strange as that sounds. Instead, take a proactive role in getting what you want and need out of your time here at Ross. I know that's kind of ambiguous but once you get here (or if you're already here), you'll know what I mean.
So, now you know EVERYTHING. *YaY* I know this post was excruciatingly long. I've actually been writing it for weeks now. Every couple of days I write a paragraph or so. I promise I won't write this much in a single post again. We just took our Mini 2 exam yesterday. When I find out how I did, I'll write a much shorter post on how I've been doing this semester. Spoiler: I'm doing much better than I was last semester!
- Melissa
UPDATE: Call it coincidence but the day after I posted this entry, Ross sent its students an e-mail regarding last semester's final grades. According to them, it was a virus that affected the e-mail attachments with the grades. The virus somehow rearranged the letter grades but not the number grades. So, the number grades were right but the letter grades assigned were not. From now on, Ross is only going to send us our number grades. Then, at the bottom of the document will be the letters that correspond with the number grades. For example, 80-100 (A), 70-79 (B), MPS-69 (C), and below MPS (Fail). After 3 months, it's nice to see the administration address the problem and give an explanation for the error. You know, better late than never...
Longest Post EVER
The "How" and the "Why"
As I mentioned before, the class that did me in was Biochemistry. Since day one of last semester, I knew Biochemistry would be a struggle. Throughout my undergraduate studies, it was the only class I struggled in. For me, Orgo and Physics weren't very challenging though I felt Orgo was the most difficult of the two. My weakness has always been Biochemistry. In fact, it's the only "C" on my undergrad transcript. Because I was a Psychology major and not a Biology major, I wasn't required to take Genetics or the 4th year level Biochemistry course. So, I took my "C" in my 200 level Biochem class and ran. Due to my utter disdain for Biochem and Genetics, I did the minimum required for my degree and for Med School and never looked back. Little did I know how much that would come back to haunt me later.
So, fast forward three years later to me at Ross. The first three Biochem lectures were not bad at all. They were meant to be a review of undergrad material. We went over bonds (covalent, ionic, hydrogen, van der Waals, hydrophobic, etc.), stereochemistry (diastereomers, enantiomers, et.), reducing sugars and reagents (Tollens' and Benedict's), carbohydrates (glucose, sucrose, amylose, amylopectin, etc.), fatty acids... well, you get the picture. So far, not too bad, right? Well, for me, the butt kicking began with the fourth Biochem lecture on proteins. That lecture was difficult and the following lecture on enzymes was even worse. Then began a DNA nightmare of replication, translation, transcription, eukaryotic gene expression, prokaryotic gene expression, mutations, viruses, and ... ugh, I can't keep going. My Biochem PTSD is kicking in right about now. Anyway, so pretty much on a daily basis they hurled a barrage of Biochem at us and I was still like "Huh? Wait. What's a gene again?" Not pretty. I just couldn't keep up. So, by the time Mini 1 reared its ugly head, we had covered five weeks worth of Biochem which came out to about 30 lecture hours. Then, there was still DPS, Anatomy, and A LOT of Histology. It seemed like there was never enough time to cover it all.
That Monday afternoon, when I turned in my scantron, I felt like I had just failed everything. I remember just wanting to stay in bed depressed all night while my fellow classmates went out and partied all night long. To them, it didn't matter how they did - they were just glad it was over. For me, I had just finished the hardest exam I had ever taken and I did NOT do well. I swore I got a 15% in Biochemistry. Turns out, I did better than I thought I did. I passed DPS, Anatomy, and Histology without a problem. Biochem, as always, was a different story. I got a whopping 48% on Mini 1. To this day, I still don't know how I managed a 48%. I think it was due to the sheer volume of questions. There were like 49 Biochem questions. Also, the Biochem department dropped about 8 questions. If I remember correctly, they dropped three that I got right and four that I got wrong. I think that somewhere between dropped questions, miraculously guessing right, and actually knowing a few questions, I somehow ended up with a 48%.
Mini 2 went MUCH better for me. I got a 92% in Histo and I actually passed Biochem! After Mini 2, I realized that I don't suck at all of Biochem. I only suck at the Genetics component of it. Silver lining, people! Mini 2 Biochem covered blood groups, plasma (blood) proteins and enzymes, the blood coagulation cascade, hemoglobin, Sickle Cell, glycolysis, TCA, ox phos, and much more. For me, Mini 2 material was more interesting (because it was more clinical) and easier to understand. The reduced volume of Biochem on Mini 2 and the reduced genetic component seemed to have helped my grade as well.
Mini 3 barely had any Biochem on it. Mini 3 Biochem was only worth 5% of our entire grade. This is because Mini 3 was basically all Physio. The Physio portion was worth 45% of our entire Physio grade. Because of this, I focused on Physio more than anything. Unfortunately, I didn't focus on Biochem at all and my grade suffered for it. My attitude going into Mini 3 was "Physio is worth too much and Biochem isn't worth anything. 5% is nothing. I'm going to focus on Physio because it's much more important that I do well on Physio on this Mini than Bio." While this is true, for me (because I was struggling in Bio), this was a BIG mistake. Out of the possible 5%, I only earned about 2%. Had I just spent a little more time on Bio for Mini 3 and answered a few more questions correctly, that may have been the difference between passing and failing first semester. Remember, the difference was ONE percent. This may have been the Mini that sealed my fate.
The final exam was ... HARD. There were only 25 Biochem questions on the final. 25 questions covered a whole semester's worth of Biochem! Studying for the final was so difficult for me. It seemed like too much material in too little time. I just didn't know where to begin. I had to go back to all the DNA garbage that plagued me on Mini 1. Since I didn't know Mini 1 material very well and I still had to cover Mini 2 and Mini 3 material, needless to say, the final didn't go very well for me. My other grades suffered as well because in the five days leading up to the final, I ONLY studied for Biochem. I felt that it didn't matter if I studied and did well in my other subjects if I didn't pass Bio. So, I gave Bio my full attention and effort. As you can see, my plan backfired. Turns out, you can't cram a whole semester of Biochem, especially if you didn't know it well enough to begin with, in 5 days.
And so, Mini 1 Bio (worth 35%) and the final (worth 35%) comprised 70% of my entire Biochem grade. Unfortunately, these two exams were my worst. For Bio, Mini 2 was worth 20%, Mini 3 was worth 5%, and PBL factored in another 5% to total 100%. So, in the end, I couldn't make up for my poor performance on Mini 1 and the final.
Mini 2 aside, I consistently did poorly (hovering around MPS) in Bio across the board. Still, I got close to passing. But as you can see, I didn't deserve to pass. I didn't know my Biochem well enough to move on to second semester. Let's say I did earn that 1% that would have allowed me to pass. I would have to face first semester Bio on the Biochem shelf at the end of 2nd semester. And then I'd have to face it again on the comprehensive exam (which determines if you can sit for Step I) at the end of 4th semester. And then I'd have to face it again on the Step! So, in a way, I'm glad I didn't scrape by. I'd rather I fail semester 1 and retake Bio and learn it properly, than fail the comprehensive exam at the end of 4th semester. Did you know that you have three chances to pass the comp exam? If you cannot pass the comp by the third try, Ross kicks you out for good. So, I like to think that retaking Bio will help me pass and perform better on my Biochem shelf, the comp (hopefully on the first try!), and ultimately, STEP I.
Now you all know how I failed. It wasn't that I didn't study or I didn't try. It's just that I struggled with the material, I didn't study efficiently, I didn't properly manage my time, and I didn't seek any help. It can happen to anyone.
My advice for incoming students is this:
1) If you struggled with any of the first semester classes (Physio, Bio, Histo, Anatomy) while you were in undergrad, chances are you may struggle with that class here at Ross. My advice is to brush up on that subject before you come here. You can re-read your old notes or read the BRS book on that subject. Find a way to strengthen your knowledge in that subject while you have the time.Once school starts, it's difficult to find the time to review those undergrad concepts that you were shaky on. Here, it's expected that you mastered the fundamentals and that you're ready to build on that.
2) Consider a Masters degree. After college, my boyfriend earned a Masters in Biomedical Sciences at Barry University. He was part of the accelerated program and finished his Masters in one year. In that year, he took all the first year medical courses you would normally take in medical school. Needless to say, he was EXTREMELY prepared for his first semester here at Ross. In the end, he finished first semester with excellent grades. When I was considering Ross, he advised me to look into the same program but I just wanted to start medical school already! Perhaps if I had listened (don't tell him I said that), I would have been better prepared for my medical studies here at Ross. I have also met several others that earned a Masters in similar programs across the country. They all aced first semester and are currently doing well in second semester. Of course, this may not be the recipe for success for everyone. There are MANY people that did well first semester that did not take the extra time and spend the extra money on a Masters degree. I just wanted to point out that this is one option if you've never heard of it or considered it.
3) If you find yourself drowning in the material once you start here, seek help! You can go see the professors themselves. You can join a study group. You can go to the academic success office where they have several counselors willing to help. They can help you map out a schedule to better manage your time or they can help teach you how to study more efficiently. They also have afternoon sessions where you go over practice problems. These practice problems are written by the professors themselves. Several of my friends would go to these sessions and found that going over these practice problems helped them prepare for the style of questions asked on the Minis. Then, there is also peer tutoring available. Just about every night, upper semester students hold tutoring sessions for first semesters that you can sit in on. They can go over any question in any subject you'd like. There are many other resources out there. The point is that they are there. If you're struggling, find help!
More to come in this saga... stay tuned!
-Melissa
The Lion Fight
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As some of you have noticed, I have been absent from the blogging realm for many weeks now. Truth is, a lot has happened since my last post. I simply wasn't ready to write about it just yet- but I'm ready now. So, here it goes...
I haven’t written in such a long time because I knew that when it came time to write again, I had to admit to myself and to the world that I failed. And so, I’ve dreaded writing this entry for a long time. But before I could write again, I needed time to figure out what went wrong last semester and how I could turn it all around. But most importantly, I needed time to just accept it. So, I took my time and I'm at a place now where I've done a lot of soul searching and finally regained some confidence.
Knowing how difficult it is to share your worst failure with others, friends and even Ross counselors advised to only share this information with people that absolutely NEED to know. But, since day one, I have chosen to chronicle my medical school journey with my family, friends, and thousands of internet strangers. If there is ever anything that needs to be shared, I feel it is this. Future and current Ross students NEED to know about failing at Ross.So, yes, I failed ONE class by ONE percent. Because of that, I am back in first semester - back at square one as if I had never been here just a few weeks ago. It's taken me a while to accept it and to get to a place where I can feel good about repeating. Truth is, MANY of my fellow classmates scraped by with the minimum passing score in one or more classes and were allowed to move on to second semester. I missed the minimum passing score in Biochemistry by ONE percent.
Turns out, going back to the beginning may have been the best thing for me. I like to think that missing out on that 1% will make me a better doctor. Because I will be responsible for someone's life someday, I'm glad I have the opportunity to go back and learn what I didn't learn the first time. So, this semester I've been picking up all the concepts and details I didn't understand before or didn't have time to digest the first time around. I understand things better and I have a better grasp of the fundamentals of medicine. I've also learned to study more efficiently. But most importantly, I've learned to appreciate medicine and every day, my passion for it grows. I've always believed that nothing in life is worth having if you don't have to work hard for it. My failure has only motivated me to work harder. Failing made me realize how much I want to be a doctor. And let me tell you, you have to want to be a doctor REAL bad to come back to Dominica for four more months (totaling 20 months on the island) and an extra $25,000 in debt!
It'll probably take several entries to catch you all up to where I'm at now.I want to tell you about all the other people that failed. I want to tell you about how we all did on our second Mini 1. I want to write about how and why people fail. I want to share with you how Ross deals with failing students and repeaters. I want to share where I went wrong last semester so others don't make the same mistakes. There is so much to write about...
I am not the first, nor will I be the last person to fail a class at Ross. Unfortunately, failing at Ross is not uncommon. I hope to share my experiences so that those coming to Ross don't repeat my mistakes. And if another student out there has failed or is in danger of failing, I hope my experiences will give them hope and help them gain the confidence they need to continue on their medical journey. I'm not saying I've got it all figured out. I'm just saying "I've been there." I just hope that I'll be able to help others by sharing my experiences and what has helped me the second time around.
Some people find the inspiration they need to keep going by reading their Holy Book or by talking to their friends and family, etc. Me? Grey's Anatomy. I was feeling really hopeless and depressed right after I found out I failed and that I would need to repeat first semester. Then, one night while I was watching an episode of Grey's Anatomy, a scene came up that seemed to hit all the right notes. It was the kick in the butt I needed to get out of my rut and put me in the right mindset to keep working towards my dream. Watch the scene below and you'll see what I mean.
It still gets me every time....
= MY SCAR